Thursday, September 3, 2009

A Heart- Aching Picture

He is one little silent body with two piercing holes that make the mind endlessly shiver with sadness to the loss of such innocence for the sake of nothing. He laid there on their burdened hands with no breath. Little angel that once laughed with the joy of living has nothing to laugh about anymore but instead has caused weary eyes to weep his sudden death. He laid there; his eyes wide open with wondering astonishment about all the suffering and pain he has been witnessing all his life not knowing that his bewilderment has come to an end and for what? He is awaiting the hands that will shut those eyes for the last time as if they have not been already shut all their life by all the merciless killing of his beloved ones, his neighbors and friends. How many days did this little one spend playing with the toys we so lamely throw away for the much we have? How many days did this little one enjoy the food that we have many times thrown to waste just because it was not suiting to our taste anymore?

Look around you and open your eyes wide enough to see the truth that some people try to hide. What is life to you? Is it a bizarre chance of consequences where all what matters is just a bunch of non-existing objects that are worthless? Such a hard question to understand but it is the first question that crossed my mind when I opened that link and saw that heart- aching picture of an innocent child who has been shot in the chest. At that moment, I did not want to open my eyes anymore and see. I did not want to comprehend how life must have been to such a child. I did not want to compare the life I live to the life others are losing in a second for nothing rather than them being born in different circumstances.

Eventually I did. I opened them and found my heart dead. It turned out I am not alive as I thought I am. What is being alive when the freedom I have is useless compared to all the suffering that others have to go through to live a second of my freedom? How ridiculous my complaints seemed to me the moment my eyes saw what death meant? All I was able to do was to go and hold my three little babies so tight as if afraid of a haunting image I have just seen. My mind could not stop thinking for a second how lucky I am to have each one of them; therefore, I even held tighter. I closed my eyes and smelled their scent and the moment my eyes were closed is when I imagined all the sorrow this kid’s mom must be going through right now. I cried and ducked down so fast to feel the weakness her limbs might be feeling for the sight she is seeing. I laid my palm on the chest of each one of my children to feel their hearts drum with existence. Still, I even held tighter. So sad is what people are going through these days. All I was able to think of is, “How can the angels’ murderers sleep peacefully at night when the blood of innocence is dripping from their hands?”

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